Resilience =
the ability to withstand and snap back quickly from difficulties; mental toughness.
Gratitude =
the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation.
Thanksgiving is the perfect time to talk about gratitude. It turns out that setting up the daily habit of being thankful develops resiliency in the human brain. Children with dyslexia daily face tougher challenges than typical kids. They can see they are working so much harder yet not getting the same results.
Students we tutor at Aspire Academy express this theme regularly in heartfelt discussions with their tutors. My son who has dyslexia also expressed it. He spent more time doing homework than his peers, and he had to routinely remind teachers of his 504 accommodations. No small feat when you are in middle school and high school.
How does being grateful build resiliency? In the book, The Upward Spiral, Dr. Alex Korb states that there is a gratitude circuit in the brain. Dr. Korb states that “strengthening this circuit brings the power to elevate physical and mental health, boost happiness, improve sleep and feel more connected to other people.”
But how does a habit of teaching our children to be grateful for what is going well in their life strengthen their ability to withstand difficulties and quickly snap-back from challenges?
Dr. Korb says that being grateful doesn’t minimize our challenges, but it helps us realize there is good going on every day. If we only think about what is going bad, it creates a negative feedback loop in the brain that feels nothing in life is going right, and leads to anxiety, depression and stress that destroys our physical and mental health. Balancing the challenges with recognizing what we have to be thankful for helps children recognize that life is a series of blessings and challenges.
The habit of gratefulness can be easily incorporated into a child’s bedtime routine. Each night when you tuck your child into bed, discuss what went well in their day. Talk to them about what went well in your day also to model that you are thankful too. Listen to their challenges and complaints, acknowledge them, but then bring them back to what went well. Even if nothing went well, most children can be thankful for a warm house, blankets, and toys.
Research truly shows that daily gratitude practices modeled to children helps them navigate the ups and downs of daily life.
